Saturday, October 29, 2011

Unplugged for reflection....

This week at CenterPoint Church we engaged in a technology fast which meant limiting or completely unplugging ourselves from the likes of music, Facebook, television, Internet surfing, gaming, app usage, etc.  This provided us with more time to spend with God and our families.  For me this meant a lot of quiet time to read and think.  God put it on my heart to share the story of the interesting beginning of our pregnancy.


On March 13th I woke up and knowing I was a few days "late" took a pregnancy test.  It was a Sunday morning and after almost 9 months of trying the test finally yielded a positive result.  Surprised and elated I crawled back into bed to tell Chris the good news.  He smiled and kissed me then nodded back off leaving me to sit in awe.  We then proceeded with our Sunday, involving hours at church and time relaxing. 


The next day I called the doctor's office and they scheduled us for an appointment on March 28th for a sonogram and visit with the doctor.  Chris and I kept everything quiet for those two weeks and met up for the doctor's appointment that night.  The appointment did not go as planned for us.  Upon completing the sonogram the doctor whom we were meeting for the first time (I had just switched practices) informed us that while I had started a pregnancy he was unable to find a fetus or a heartbeat.  He believed I had miscarried very early and that the pregnancy had not advanced.


Needless to say I was crushed, the doctor proceeded to arrange for us to scheduled a procedure to "clean" my uterus for April 8th, however he also scheduled a follow up sonogram to "double check" for April 6th.  We left in a bit of a daze, unsure of how to handle the news.  We went home and quietly sat down to process.  I just cried not knowing how to digest the news and partially not believing what was happening.  Chris and I went to my mom's house to tell her and she comforted us as best she could.


The week proceeded and we shared our experience with some close family and friends.  Everyone was saddened by the news but promised to pray and ask God for peace, healing and His will in this situation.  I could not convince myself that this what was happening was real. That week my parents took me to Winthrop to run through pre-op testing and even then when the nurse was attempting to empathize with me I couldn't commit to the fact that I had actually miscarried.


We prayed throughout the weekend as did many others and on Tuesday went back to the doctor's office.  As the doctor dimmed the lights, I turned my head away from the screen unsure if I could handle seeing an empty womb again, being that it represented how close yet how far we were from having a baby.


Chris was holding my hand and as the doctor spoke his grip tightened.  He said something to the effect of, "Look, that wasn't there last week." The doctor with joy in his voice agreed and I turned towards the screen.  Sure enough there was a tiny little speck pulsing on the screen, followed by the sound of a heartbeat!!!  There was our baby, she was there and her heart was beating strong!!! In awe, I had little response, we talked through with the doctor the "why" of the situation and he explained I may have ovulated later and last week had been too early to detect anything, etc.


Chris and I left that visit in a different kind of awe.  What a wild roller coaster of emotions we experienced that week and how grateful we are for all the support that was displayed from our family and friends.  We continue to praise God that after a bumpy start, this pregnancy has been wonderful and that in a short time we will get to hold our little girl.  I hope this story shows the power of prayer and trust that we have in God.  The peace He provided us with throughout that week was hard to explain, however was testimony to His love for us and our little baby.

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